A lot of folks can’t understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in our country.
Well, there’s a very simple answer.
Nobody bothered to check the oil.
We just didn’t know we were getting low.
The reason for that is purely geographical.
Our oil is located in:
Our dipsticks are located in Washington, D.C.
Just once, just once, I'd love to see a congressional hearing where congressmen do the hearing.
No speeches. No finger-pointing. No made-for-TV broadsides.
They just sit. They just listen.
For once, just once, I want to see this ritual of dragging oil executives to Capitol Hill an informative event, and not a media one.
For once, just once, I'd like the witnesses treated like professionals, and not like piñatas.
And for once, just once, I'd like to see the tables turned.
Let the witnesses question the questioners.
The piñatas, the politicians.
Let them demand of Congress:
You think we're making too much money? What are you doing with all our money?
You won't let us explore for more oil here, but you're ripping OPEC for not producing more oil over there? Who's the bigger hypocrite? Or the more sanctimonious ass?
And year after year, you repeatedly reject the president's energy plan, then have the temerity to complain he has no plan?
Frankly, senators, you have no soul.
You'd sooner point fingers at us, than get down to work for us.
Just like you'd sooner rip successful American companies who refine that pricey oil than the slippery folks at OPEC who provide it.
Just whose side are you on ... the folks who want to get that oil here ... or the thieving bastards you kowtow to over there?
Then for once, just once, I'd like the oil guys to stand up in unison and say, ‘Senators, we have companies to run.
We're sure you have press conferences to conduct.’
We've got to wake up here, folks.
We have to drill.
And we have to drill this simple point through some environmentalists' thick skulls.
If we do it now, we can look forward to having it soon. Not real soon, but sooner than if we do nothing at all.
Pity is we could have had it much sooner had we explored much earlier.
When we had the chance, and the legislation, and the opportunity.
But we nixed the chance, and rejected the legislation, and blew an opportunity.
Now, we're blowing our future.
Because this isn't about protecting polar bears.
This is about protecting us.
And our very economic future.
Look, I'm not saying oil is the answer.
But I know, not getting so much oil from guys who'd sooner wish us dead isn't the answer.
So look for alternatives here.
Look at solar here, and wind here, and nuclear here.
And yes, look for oil here.
But for god's sake, do something here.
Because it ain't getting any friendlier there.
So here's what stops now.
The blame game. The press conference game. The kangaroo court parading oil execs game.
The whole 'I'm outraged' game.
Because you know what?
I'm outraged that you, Congress, keep sayin’ you're outraged, but don't do a damn thing about it.
So stop talking, start doing.
Stop blocking, start exploring.
And while you're at it, start looking for the backbone I know you hide.
It's just above the ass I know you have.